apatheticq's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Upset, and growing sick. I am so fucking pissed off. Why? Cause I have spent the last hour trying to get to sleep, while listening to my girlfriend cry, and sing depressing songs. What did I do? Nothing. She is just an unstable wreck half the time, and it's driving me nuts. I can't take any more of this. I am happy. I have a new job which I work very hard at. For the last week, the only thing bothering me is her, and when everything is going good, it highlights the parts in your life that are negatively affecting you. I don't know what the hell I am going to do, but I honestly can't take any more of this. Any more of her hitting the wall because she's upset. Spending all of her time crying, depressed when there is nothing I can do to correct it. It's all up to her, and she shows no willingness to fucking calm down, and get even. I just don't want anymore of this shit. I don't want to deal with anymore crying while I am trying to get to sleep, knowing I have to be awake in 5 and a half hours, yet all I can hear is her singing the most depressing songs accenting the words like "hate", "fuck" and "Hurt." I spend all of my time away from work attempting to make her feel good, and take care of her, and I take it personally that she is so depressed, yet I've done nothing wrong. Maybe I shouldn't, but she just wanders around in an odd haze. It's not that I want to be with anyone else, it's just I don't want to be like this. 9:58 p.m. - September 18, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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