apatheticq's Diaryland Diary

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cuddling close to blankets and sheets

I feel magnificant. A sensation that flows across my skin tingling every nerve. Nervous, and in love, and no where near in love. This is where I want to be. To bottle up such emotions, and never let them leave the tight restraints of my memory.

No realization will detour me from smiling. No idea will infiltrate my fragile psyche today. Will not need that shovel to climb out of the pile of clothes left on the floor today. The vividness may fade, but the idea that my heart is still capable of such amazement is enough to kick my heels together.

Foreign are the idea's of a better tomarrow which is out of grasp. No new year's resolution will starve me, or force me to hate myself today. Falling in love for the first time all over again, yet with myself.

The beads of sweat have disipated. Let the good times spoil me.

I sound like I am attempting to convince myself of this, but it isn't the case. If tomarrow is down, then it is. This moment is all I have, and it is splendid.

-que

7:03 a.m. - January 02, 2002

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